The one where Lindsay thinks to herself "my legs feel like jelly!"

Last night I joined a gym. I know, I know, "I love Curves" blah blah blah. Well, Curves wasn't cutting it anymore - I think it just wasn't hard enough. So anyways, last night I joined up since they're literally building a brand-spanking new gym not two miles from my house. Feeling very proud of myself, and more than a little bit nervous I got myself to the gym this morning. And lo and behold... I found a Precor. I remembered reading something about that little dilly of a machine here, but I didn't remember exactly what it was all about.

Here's how it went in my internal monologue.

Oh, an elliptical-type machine! I've always wanted to try one of those. I'll hop on. Hmmm. Looks like a lot of buttons, but I'm not an idiot, so I'll be able to figure it out...... Hey, feeling pretty good! I'm getting a nice stride going and it feels sort of natural, like they all said it would...... Whew, a little harder than i thought it would be, and I didn't think I'd be breathing this heavily. I'll push on....... Holy crap, is it just this hard for me, or am I just a freak?...... Good God, I know it's just me. That granny next to me is kicking my ass!...... Whoa, my heart rate's into the WAY THE HELL TOO HIGH zone......Wait a minute, I can do this thing backwards? Seriously? Good, because I could use a rest...... I'm sweating. I'm sweating sooo much. And I didn't bring  towel with me. Tomorrow I'm bringing one with me, and a bottle of water...... I look like I'm sitting in a sauna I'm sweating so much. And is it really necessary to arrange the stationary bikes right in back of the ellipticals? I swear that punk back there is staring at my arse. Tomorrow I'm going to use the one on the other side of the room....... It can NOT have only been eight minutes so far. I've easily burned, what, nine million calories or something..... Screw everyone who raved about this freaking machine. It SUCKS. I HATE this machine. And more than that, I hate Granny next to me......... Just 45 more seconds for ten minutes. 44, 43, 42........ Finally, I can get off. But I refuse to pull a Bridget Jones and fall off the machine. I'll step down gracefully, even if slowly....... Hey, my legs feel like jelly!......... I think I'll go for 12 minutes tomorrow.